As night drew on, I stood alone in front of the window and looked into the distance—lights were blazing in every house. I had much desire to have a cozy home where my parents accompanied me, and thought that if so, no matter what happened to me, I would not be afraid. With the rumbling sound of an airplane coming through the evening air, I thought: Is the airplane carrying my returning father? I knew what I thought were fantasies, but I still could not help but miss my father far away, so I made a paper airplane for him and let it take my thought of him.
After my mother had a car accident, it was you who accompanied me all the way when I was growing up. You took care of my basic necessities and listened to me talk about the things I had encountered. We smiled happily and spent four seasons together.
However, that day when I got out of class and went home, I didn’t see that you, as usual, prepared a meal waiting for me. Later I learnt that you had no choice but to leave home because the CCP captured believers of God everywhere. I knew you didn’t want to leave me very much and that you were certainly full of concern for me when you left.
Thinking back to when you were at home, you often dinned in my ears: “Don’t get along with bad children. Don’t always play games or play on the computer at home. Don’t follow fashions in clothes. Don’t pursue the evil trends of society. All of these can only make you more and more degenerate….” At that time, I was tired of these words. But now not seeing your familiar figure and not hearing your chatter, I actually am not accustomed.
Dad, I guess your biggest concern has to do with my playing games. I remembered when you were at home, every time you saw me playing games or watching TV series phone in hand and without looking up, you nagged me: “That’s not right. You’re so young, but you become lost in games. If you go on like this, you will gradually be decadent….” At the time, I was enjoying myself too much to stop and listen to what you said, which provoked you to anger many a time. Dad, in fact, I did not want to be infatuated with games like that, let alone provoke you to anger. However, as soon as I saw the games on my cellphone, I was irresistibly attracted to them.
Afterward, you read to me a passage from the word of God: “The devil Satan does these things in order to lure people, to cause them to degenerate. For those who live in virtual worlds, they have no interest whatsoever in anything to do with the life of normal humanity; they are not in the mood to work or study. They are only concerned about going to virtual worlds, as though they are being enticed by something. Scientists have conducted some research and found that, as soon as someone plays a game and when they enter into a game, their brains start to secrete something that makes them somewhat delusional. After this thing has been secreted, they then become addicted to playing games and are always thinking about playing them. The second they get bored or are sitting idle, or when they are doing some real work, at their job or study, they want to play games instead, and playing games gradually becomes their whole life. Playing games is like taking a kind of drug. Once someone starts to play games, once they enter into them, then it becomes hard to get back out and hard to quit. So regardless of whether it is young people or older people, once they catch this bad habit, it becomes difficult to give it up.”
After reading God’s words, you said that playing games is an evil trend, and is one way that Satan beguiles and corrupts us mankind. When Satan makes us become addicted to games, we can’t help thinking about the plots of the games every day. Gradually, our regular lives and studies will all be taken the place of by the games and we will become more and more degenerate. At your words, I thought: That really is the case. Since I indulged in games, I have not been in the mood to do anything, including my homework. Instead, I only want to play games, and I even can’t control myself. The games are truly harmful to us.
From that moment on, you often gave me the fellowship of God’s words. This made me better recognize Satan’s sinister motives. So I was willing to accept your supervision to gradually break away from the binds of games. Later, I wasn’t addicted to games as before.
However, since you left home, I had no force of restraint, and did not often read God’s words, becoming distanced from God. Little by little, my heart was attracted to the games again. When seeing my classmates all played games, and that some of them played those new and popular games, I felt anxious inside. I thought that everyone could play them except me. Then wasn’t I too outdated? Consequently, I began to follow them to play those games. Finally, I couldn’t help but be inextricably trapped again. Even though when I didn’t play games, I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about the plots of them. This caused that I couldn’t focus my attention to listening to my teachers when in class and that my academic record dropped a lot. I knew things couldn’t keep going on this way. I wasn’t willing to waste away and wanted to not play games, but I couldn’t control myself. I could only pray to God in silence and ask Him to arrange situations to change me.
Later I saw one of my classmates played games so much that he didn’t do his homework. One day, when the teacher criticized him in class, he unexpectedly grasped the teacher by his throat and pinned him to the desk. Our whole class was completely stunned seeing this. Then there was another time when I bought something at a shop. I heard an old woman saying that after her grandson played games at home all day, she came forward and told him not to continue doing that. Unexpectedly, her grandson got red in the face with anger, kicked at the door and even cursed her, as if crazy. At that time, I remembered a passage of God’s words you read to me before: “Always playing games, always playing on the computer—this kind of person is decadent. ‘Decadence’ is a word of the unbelievers. We say that these people have no normal humanity. They have been filled with the violence and killing of these games and with the things of virtual worlds. The things of normal humanity have been stripped away by these games, filled and forcibly occupied by them, and they have forcibly occupied the things within people’s thoughts as well as any room they have for thought; they are then decadent.”
I realized: This really is how things are! The games are full of violent things. When playing games for a long time, we people can’t distinguish between the real world and the virtual world; in our dealings with others, we will have violent inclinations and no normal humanity. Just like my classmate, due to being addicted to playing games, he no longer wanted to keep learning or go to school. What’s more, when the teacher gave him a lecture, he grasped the teacher by the throat. And there is also the example of the old woman’s grandson—when his grandmother criticized him because of his playing games, he swore at her. Weren’t these consequences caused by playing online games which is an evil trend raised up by Satan? Games make us lose humanity and reason. Going on in this way, we will really become useless persons spoken of by God. As I thought about this, I couldn’t help but be afraid for myself, thinking: If I can’t escape from Satan’s bondage but continue on like this, I will finally be the same as the above two and become someone without any humanity. Thinking of my playing games these days, I was filled with the things of the violence and killing and didn’t have a regular life. When throwing myself into games, even if I was hungry, I couldn’t think of eating; even if sleepy, I didn’t want to sleep; I did nothing but play games on the mobile phone every day. No matter what popular games my schoolmates played, I immediately downloaded, bought the equipment and upgraded my game accounts. When doing this, I had even forgotten that I was a Christian. I did not wish to continue degenerating in such a way, but I had no ability to overcome sin. How could I do to overcome my internet addiction, I wondered?
Later on, during a gathering, I told my state of playing games to my brothers and sisters. They read me a passage from: “You should implore God often, that you not fall into temptation, and that you not be deceived by Satan. In this evil age, in this age infested by unclean spirits and devils, you should pray that God’s kindness and protection will often be with you, that He looks after you and protects you, so that your heart won’t leave God, and you can strive to use your heart and your honesty to worship God. Is it a right way to follow? (Yes, it is.) So do you wish to walk this path? Are you willing to live often under God’s care and protection, often to be disciplined by God, or do you wish to live in your own free world?”
After reading God’s words, one of the sisters fellowshipped to me: “Living in this evil world, we are faced with the enticement of Satan around us, which is impossible for us to defend against. Especially games, they are full of all manner of violence, magic, deception, combat images of violence and killing, and so on. These are the means that Satan uses to corrupt and devour man. If we are the slightest bit careless, we will fall into Satan’s schemes. We don’t know how many young people are obsessed with online games and unable to extricate themselves. Since we are believers of God, we should see through the harm playing games brings to us and distinguish the evil essence of Satan who uses games to deceive and harm mankind based on God’s words. When we want to play games, we should consciously come in front of God to pray, and beseech Him to protect our hearts so that they can’t be drawn to games. We also must have the will to forsake the flesh and believe that God is our ever-present reliance. When we have a place for God within our hearts, we will live under the care and protection of Him and Satan will have no opportunity to exploit. In addition, we should open up to brothers and sisters about our situations and listen more to their experiences of getting rid of the addiction to games. Moreover, we should accept their supervision. Step by step, we will completely break free from the bond of games.”
Having listened to what the sister fellowshipped, I saw that Satan truly is too despicable and that it is ceaselessly entrapping and devouring mankind. I could no longer be fooled and afflicted by it. I determined that I’ll diligently read God’s words, rely on God more and accept the supervision of brothers and sisters and that I must break my gaming addiction.
Dad, under God’s leadership, the instances when I played games now became much less. Although sometimes I still wanted to play again, I would pray to God and take out the book of His word to read. Gradually, my thoughts of playing games disappeared. I saw that God was at my side protecting me, allowing me to avoid Satan’s temptations. Later on, God arranged an environment for me. When a sister helped me clean up my mobile phone, she accidentally deleted all of the games on it. At that moment I felt it was a pity. However, after that, I thought it was in fact God’s protection of me. He knew I didn’t gain the truth and that sometimes I couldn’t control myself on my own. If these games had been still left on my phone, they would be only bad for me and of no benefit. Gradually, as I read more and more of God’s words, I became better at distinguishing that Satan harmed us by using games and also no longer wanted to play them like before. As time went on, I was not interested in games, and it was as if I had forgotten them. I thank God from my heart for protecting me.
Dad, you no longer need to be worried about me playing games and learning bad ways. Now I often read God’s words with my brothers and sisters, share experiences with them, sing hymns and praise God. Additionally, that everyone helps me and looks after me in life makes me experiencefor me. I have already learnt to live on my own—I can cook, do laundry, do different kinds of housework and even make stuffed dumpling. Dad, you must feel that I am great! Now, in God’s company, I become stronger and more independent than before. Just fulfill your duty with peace of mind outside. Don’t worry about me.
Maybe you also like to read: A Letter to Father Who Left Home Because of Religious Persecution
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