By Wang Nan
I am Wang Nan. It is five years since I accepted God’s work of. During my life over these years, I have gained some understanding of God’s almightiness and sovereignty. Especially in 2017, when a myocardial infarction (MI) suddenly affected me, it was God who protected me and gave me a second chance at life. I felt very deeply that my fate is in God’s hands and that only God is my rock.
MI suddenly affected me and I came close to death.
On Sept. 6, 2017, I suddenly felt weak and fell on the bed. My heart felt incredibly uncomfortable that I dared not breathe, with my face pale and my eyes tightly closed. I was unable to say a single thing or open my eyes, and my body was unable to move at all. At that moment, I felt that in face of illness, I was so insignificant and feeble and that human life was so vulnerable. The feeling, where death drew near but I was unable to do anything and could only wait quietly, made my heart full of terror.
Just when I was in pain and helpless, I suddenly thought of God and that my life and death are in God’s hands. Then I urgently cried out to Him in my heart, “O God! An illness has suddenly come upon me and I don’t know whether I will die. I feel very weak right now and very afraid. But I know my life and death are in Your hands and whether I live or die is not up to me. I wish to entrust myself to You, and even if I do die, I will obey. May You give me faith and strength. Allow me not to live in worry and fear.” After praying, my heart calmed down a lot.
Then my wife came in. She saw me lying in the bed in distress and hurriedly called her sister and asked her to drive me to a hospital. When I was waiting for the car, I went to the toilet. At the very moment I stood up from the toilet, I suddenly felt dizzy, and sat down on the ground. At that time, I was entirely lacking strength and my mind went blank. My wife raised me strenuously, supported me in her arms with all her might and staggered toward the house. We had gone halfway when I involuntarily sat down on the ground and my mind went blank again. My wife got frightened and anxious and she assisted me into the house. I lay in the bed with my eyes tightly closed. My heart beat irregularly so that I couldn’t get a good breath. I felt that death was right in front of me. I thought, “There was a person in our village who suffered MI and had the same symptoms as mine. Do I have the same kind of disease? Whoever gets this disease will die at any time. If I have it, I don’t know if I can survive. After suffering MI, many victims died very quickly; some died halfway before they got to the hospital. Will I die like them? …” As I was thinking all this, my tears streamed down uncontrollably. In my misery, I could only pray to God in my heart, “O God! I am in pain and weak now that this illness has befallen me. No one can help me. Only You are my rock. All that I have come from You and my life and death are all in Your hands. I am willing to entrust my life and death to You. May You lead me to escape the fear of death.” Thank God for listening to my prayer. After I prayed, the feeling where death was closing in on me disappeared gradually. This made me distinctly feel that God was by my side and I wasn’t so worried and afraid any more.
God’s words gave me faith and made me face death with boldness.
Seeing me with such a serious illness, my wife called her sister again and asked when she would arrive. Because she was driving from another city, it required time. Seeing this situation, my wife had to ask our neighbor to drive me to the hospital. At the time, it was already over two hours after I got the illness. I, lying in the back seat, felt insecure and started to worry that my illness would suddenly recur. But it occurred to me: God is almighty. I must rely on Him and obey His orchestrations. Therefore, I earnestly cried out to God in my heart. Then my heart calmed down a lot. I thought of a passage of, “While undergoing trials, it’s normal for people to be weak, or have negativity within them, or to lack clarity on or their path for practice. But in any case, you must have ’s work, and not deny God, like Job. Although Job was weak and cursed the day of his own birth, he did not deny that all things in human life were bestowed by Jehovah, and that Jehovah is also the One to take it all away. No matter how he was tested, he maintained this belief. … When Job reached this point, God appeared to him and spoke to him. That is, it is only from within your faith that you will be able to see God, and when you have faith God will perfect you. Without faith, He cannot do this.”
God’s words made me have strength inside me. And from these words I knew that when trials came to Job and he developed terrible boils all over his body, although he neither understood God’s will, nor knew when he would recover, yet he could still hold firm to his faith, didn’t deny God and could even extol His holy name, submit to His rule and arrangements, face death calmly and didn’t complain. When he stood firm in his testimony, Satan was shamed and fled. God then gained glory through and testimony in him, and finally Job saw the appearance of God. Compared to Job, I saw that my faith in God truly was too small. When facing illness and death, although I prayed to God saying that I was willing to submit to God’s rule, yet I didn’t entrust God completely with my life and death, so I was still quite afraid and weak. At the same time, I also found a path of practice in God’s words. I should follow the example of Job—during circumstances when I didn’t see the result or know what my end would be, I should keep faith with God and believe that my life is from God, and that God has the right to take away. I was willing to hand my life over to God’s hands, and no matter whether I would die or live, I would obey God’s orchestration and arrangement, and not blame Him.
At this time, I thought of God’s words: “The life of the resurrectedis within us. We really lack faith in the presence of God, and may God put true faith within us. The word of God is sweet indeed! God’s word is potent medicine! Put to shame the devils and Satan! If we grasp God’s word we will have support and His word will quickly save our hearts! It dispels all things and sets all in peace. Faith is like a single log bridge, those who cling abjectly to life will have difficulty in crossing it, but those who are ready to sacrifice themselves can pass over without worry. If man has timid and fearful thoughts, they are being fooled by Satan. It fears that we will cross the bridge of faith to enter into God. Satan devises every way possible to send us its thoughts, we should always pray that the light of God will shine on us, and we must always rely on God to purify us from Satan’s poison. We shall always be practicing in our spirits to come close to God. We shall let God have dominion over our whole being.” Pondering God’s words, I had more confidence in God. I realized that, when faced with death, my timidity and fear were from Satan and I should not be fooled by Satan. I believed God is almighty, and that I shouldn’t doubt God but believe in His words. I could not just dwell in sickness. Whether I could get successfully to the hospital or not and whether I would die or live, I would commit them to God. After understanding God’s will, I became strong in my spirit and was not so frightened as before but had more and more faith in God.
Seeing me quiet all the way, the driver was afraid that I would die at any time, so he reminded my wife, “You’d better speak with your husband. Don’t let him get to sleep.” Hearing this, I waved my hand, motioning that I didn’t fall asleep and that I was awake. With the soothing and support of God’s words, I felt more at ease and peaceful in my heart.
With God’s protection, I pulled through safely.
Before I knew it we reached the hospital. I was sent to the emergency room. The doctor diagnosed me with MI, and said to me anxiously, “If you arrived any later, your life would be over.” After that, the doctors quickly arranged for me to be in the intensive care unit and gave me first aid. I had an IV in my arm, with a tube inserted into my nose and various medical instruments attached to me. When I lay in bed, although I couldn’t open my eyes, I was fully conscious. I didn’t dare to leave God even for a second in my heart and kept calling out to God, “O God! The doctors said I have had MI. I am a little weak, but I know my life and death are ruled by You. May You give me faith so that I can face my situation calmly.” Under God’s protection, I got safely through that hard night.
The next day, my condition began to improve and I was transferred to a normal ward that very afternoon. Yet I still felt weak from head to toe, and couldn’t get out of bed, even unable to turn over without my wife’s help. On the third day, I could sit up with my wife’s help. My fellow patients all said, “Actually, MI is a fatal disease, which strikes people suddenly and can kill people quickly. You contracted it so suddenly and from getting it at about 9 am to seeing doctors at 1 pm, so long time has been wasted. Anyone else would have died long ago. However, you not only aren’t dead but recover so quickly. That’s a miracle.” Hearing what they said, my wife and I looked and smiled at each other. We knew in our hearts that this was all thanks to God’s protection, and so silently thanked God over and over.
Afterward, I every day would pray to God and entrust my disease entirely into God’s hands and ask Him to give me faith. God’s words say, “Almighty God is an all-powerful physician! To dwell in sickness is to be sick, but to dwell in the spirit is to be well. If you have but one breath, God will not let you die.” With God as my support, I became strong in spirit. I often quieted before God and pondered God’s words, so that my heart was not occupied by this disease. Meanwhile, God’s words made me realize that my fate, my life and death were all controlled by God and that if God didn’t allow me to die, I wouldn’t. Even if the fatal heart attack befell me, God still led me to get through the danger. Thanks be to God!
Later on, my wife helped me get out of bed to walk slowly, and I trained myself persistently. On the fifth day, I could walk slowly by myself. A doctor saw this and said to me in surprise, “You were in such a serious condition but get well so fast. This is really a miracle.” Hearing that, I didn’t say anything aloud but I knew this was all God’s great power. Thank God! It was God who cured my disease.
Under God’s protection, I was discharged from the hospital.
I was in the hospital for ten days and then returned home. My neighbors all came to visit me. When they learned that how I experienced the disease, they all said, “It was God who helped you!” Hearing them say this, I thanked God in my heart.
One day, my mother was sick and a doctor came to give her fluids. Knowing I had recovered well, he said to me, “Before, there was a person in our village who felt bad and sought me out. I told him that he might have MI and that he had better go to the hospital right away. He immediately went home to put on a new set of clothes and then went to the hospital. He wasted time so he died on the way to the hospital.” After hearing that, I saw more clearly that it truly is God’s protection that I’m still alive!
Through this extraordinary experience, I gained some true knowledge and understanding of God’s almightiness and sovereignty. We are so insignificant, feeble and helpless in face of illness. No one is capable of controlling his or her life and death. I thought of how I was sent to the hospital nearly 4 hours after I had fallen ill, and in other people’s eyes, there was no way that I was gonna survive, but under God’s care and protection, I had survived and my condition improved so quickly. These really were God’s wonderful deeds! I couldn’t help but sigh with such feeling: People’s life and death are not in doctors’ hands. They can only treat people but cannot save their lives. Only God can administer the lives and deaths of mankind. This is an undeniable fact.
Gradually, I continued to get better. Afterward, I began to partner with my brothers and sisters to fulfill our duties together. Meanwhile I’ve resolved that I’ll perform my duty properly to repay.
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